Part 2: Finding creative freedom in the grid
1. Bullet point journalling to prioritise
The phrase ‘bullet point’ may not resonate with your freedom-seeking inner artist, but hear me out. I’ve found (again and again) that when I have a lot scheduled for one day, some stuff slips through the cracks. I used to berate myself for this, but I’ve learnt to accept that I just have mad high expectations for myself. Prioritising the most important goals for the day and letting go of the rest has become essential.
I came across bullet point journalling in a low down of Tim Ferris’s morning routine I found on YouTube, in which he bullet points his ‘3 Main Goals’ for the day, letting himself know if he does these three things, he’s crushed the day. I started trying this, and it generated SO much more focus and follow-through on accomplishing my most important tasks, and SO much more peace at accepting the things that I didn’t manage to do that day. Your head needs some space and leeway to celebrate the wins instead of obsessing over the losses! And space creates freedom.
2. Honour the present, it’s all we have
The great thing about time management, and time blocking in particular, is that it sets out certain amounts of time for you to let go of everything else and focus on ONE thing because you know this is the allotted time you have to commit to it today. But this won’t work if you’re fretting about that appointment you have to book after your practice time or are pissed off because you couldn’t get your ass out of bed on time. Not being present, when you become aware of it, is actually the cause of much of your distress, because you’re resistant to this moment, now.
Eckhart Tolle, the king of presence in New Age philosophy, explains: “Your entire life only happens in this moment. The present moment is life itself. Yet, people live as if the opposite were true and treat the present moment as a stepping stone to the next moment – a means to an end”. I’d fully recommend having a read of one, if not all of his books (I confess, I’ve only read “The Power of Now”, but after the spiritual bombshells it brought, the rest are now on my ever-growing, neverending reading list).
3. Accept that the ‘perfect balance’ is a myth
I came across this gorgeous book “First, We Make the Beast Beautiful: A New Story About Anxiety” by Sarah Wilson, in which I found this quote:
“Women have got it into their heads that they should be able to do it all, and in perfect balance. And this has resulted in more stress, and less happiness. I speculate that men are feeling the same, but it’s just not reflected in the research yet. In response to these findings, UK pop researcher Marcus Buckingham investigated, inversely, what the happiest women were doing differently. And his conclusion was this: they strove for imbalance…These happy women, he said, realised that balance was impossible to achieve, and trying to do so caused unnecessary anxiety… Instead, Buckingham found these chilled, happy women tilted toward activities and commitments that they liked and found meaningful, amid the chaos. They didn’t wait for the chaos and the commitments to get under control. I loved this idea: tilting – it’s when you’ve so much to do, and you could list it all, and try to prioritise, or you could just sit in the everythingness and lean towards stuff as it arises that feels right.”Sarah Wilson, ‘First, We Make the Beast Beautiful: A New Story About Anxiety’
I was initially attacking my struggle with time management from the standpoint that if I were to find the ‘perfect balance’ across different areas of my life, I would be fulfilled, and my anxiety would lessen. I discovered, however, that this ideal continually eluded me. It was only when I shifted my focus from needing complete control to simply enjoying every day as much as possible (tilting towards activities that I like and find meaningful) that I found much greater fulfilment and, paradoxically, more balance.
4. Regardless of all your time blocking, follow your inspiration when it comes!
Regardless of your well-intentioned structure to BOSS it daily, when inspiration comes – follow it! First and foremost, before any of this structure, YOU ARE AN ARTIST. Be prepared for a whole day’s pre-scheduled activities (or a night of sleep) to be thrown out of the ballpark. If the idea is demanding it be born right here, right now, let it come. Everything comes when it’s meant to. Accept it as part of the artistic experience and don’t lose any sleep over it (aside from the sleep it claims)! It’s okay to wipe out a whole day in service of our creative flow. Just get back into a rhythm the next day or two and accept that life is about honouring both the structure and the flow. At the end of it all, the ultimate goal is creative expression. The kind that moves through us like another entity in itself. So, when it comes, embrace it and jump onto the ride.
5. Mercy for yourself (and in turn the rest of the world)
Any kind of self-development without self-nurture, self-forgiveness, and self-love, can quickly become a **** show of self-harm. Elizabeth Gilbert, author of “Eat, Pray, Love” and “Big Magic”, and one of my favourite humans outside of my real-life ones, puts this idea across as developing mercy for yourself, and in turn the rest of the world. In her 2014 blog post “MERCY. Dear ones…”, she says:
“This is perhaps the strongest argument I have for learning how to come to peace with yourself — for healing your wounds and learning how to regard the softest and weakest and most shameful parts of yourself with gentleness and compassion. If you can practice mercy upon yourself, then gradually that mercy will radiate outward to the rest of us. And that will be the end of Judgment Day, every day.
All of which is to say: It is not selfish, to learn how to be loving toward yourself: IT IS ULTIMATELY A PUBLIC SERVICE.”Elizabeth Gilbert
I noticed in my own journey as I began to treat myself more kindly, my judgements of others’ weaknesses softened. I began to see how my vigilant, aggressive self-discipline was having an unintentional ripple effect on my relationships, holding others to the inhumane standard I was holding myself. I didn’t want to be that person for my friends, my family! I end on this because despite all of your beautiful, honourable intentions with any kind of personal development, without self-mercy, you can quite easily and unintentionally begin to become a person you don’t like. So, do it with love, do it with ease, do it with compassion, every day. Try and try again, but accept the failures as necessary stepping stones and give yourself a break, MANY TIMES OVER.
Other than that, you got this, you crazy little hyper-controlling entrepreneurial boss of an artist.